Sheri Lee

I'm going to New York tomorrow so I'll be away for a while, can't wait to see everyone's updates when I get back ;)

I eat way too many potato chips. Mmm.

I want to start a Doo Wop group and then we'll randomly appear singing ala Little Shop of Horrors.

The Ronettes

Only 3 days till New York.

It's so cold tonight, I'm wearing these gargantuan grey gloves, I feel like a grizzly bear in them. I'm such a scatterbrain, everything is a mess, I lose all of my accessories, probably because I have so many. It's an addiction, rings and hats and necklaces. Kelly just smsed me all the way from mauritius, pretty cool, she's there with B Den. We hung out with them on Friday, it was beautiful, just lazing the day away in her beautiful apartment, lounging on the fatsack, napping, no responsibilities for once. I want to suspend that moment and be able to return whenever I want.

It's so cold, I actually miss smoking. But that won't ever happen again, it's almost been a year since I quit. I had some really vivid dreams last night. It's funny how seriously people take things, I think some people blow things out of proportion because it makes their lives more dramatic, they feel more significant and cope with their unhappiness better, it's like they're these gaping self-esteem voids that need extreme situations to pull them out of their holes. People think I'm not aware of pushing them away. But I am. It's easier than telling you how stagnant and negative you are.

I watched Empire Records last night, always a winner. My hairdresser used to stay over at her friend's after a night out, then every morning, without fail, they'd watch The Big Lebowski with their breakfast.

Donnie is immortal.

No one is really unique, someone else has your "offbeat" taste in movies or your love of vegetarian whatever-the-fuck-is-making-the-rounds. We all try to define ourselves with the things we like rather than how we are. My best friend is obsessed with hot pink and Nicole Richie and she's one of the most amazing people I've ever met. Smart, sensitive, caring, funny, hard-working. It's actually amusing how people try to shy away from their likes and dislikes if they aren't acceptable enough. Try to lie to themselves and pretend to be so much more perceptive because they like Angelina Jolie and burned barbies when they were younger.

It's so much funner being yourself, admitting the things that aren't cool to like. I used to hang out with a punk crowd who used to rip me off because I didn't dress hardcore enough. Lol. I was at a goth club and got snubbed by this fat girl when I asked her what music she was into. Excuse me for breathing, I forgot to pretend to be a vampire, man I'm lame. Just three weeks ago I was at a friend's brithday, one of the coolest guys ever and his emo friend stared me down. She was not having me for some reason or another. Maybe it was the laughing. I once heard laughing is to emos what nails on a chalkboark are for humans.

You're not pure, no one is. But stay on your high horse, it's so fun to watch you keep this act up. Enjoy.

I'm going to embrace my inner breakfast club. I have so many facets to my personality and I'm never going to deny them.

Speaking of being original, I invented this last week as well as the question mark:

Oh noes, we iz all blondes. I must go tan and be stupid with my friends now cos you know, that's how we are.

Just got ten minutes to finally write something. It's been such a busy week, I draped a gorgeous dress with Celeste, it just all worked out well, photos will come soon. I got my Visa for the states and Sean got his so it's just 15 more days until I land in NYC. I'm running on 1 hour of sleep and pretzels so I'm going to take a nap before Sean and I go see Chris Rock tonight. Then I must finish my storyboards, they're vampires in velvet and lace.

Let's just say a party isn't a party without fights, upside down cake, tears and a russian dancing to extremely feel good music.

Long story short, there was a clash which ended up in swearing, screaming and almost violence. That's the stuff that papa likes.

I love the girls from fashion school, to think I was scared of it at first, they're all so fun to be around. I'm meeting all of these special people with the kinds of personalities you hunt to be around.

The party spilled over into this week where drama continued and still does. The secrets and skeletons and feelings and jokes and shit talking is getting to be hilarious. Things have to be exposed. Stop hiding, come clean, enjoy. It's so much funner in the sunlight.

Whew, I have been so swamped with work I only managed to write this today. I made two bodices this week, pretty sweet, I can sew darts much better now. I still hate those small darts. 

So It was my birthday on Monday, I went to college and got this amazing reception. Everyone was wishing me and kelly had tied balloons to my desk, got me new daffodils, a jewellery box, a R300 massage voucher, cup cakes and a moo cow.

She made this amazing collage for me on the packet, it was so cool.

So this casino gave me a comped breakfast and I gambled with Sean, it was fun, 19 came up fast so we won with roulette.

Sean got me this ah-mazing skull hoodie, what a great present.

Then I went out for dinner with the family and some friends, I couldn't stop eating the bread. Tomorrow is my huge party, I can't believe how many people are coming, it's going to be crazy, I'll be hanging out with Jamy and Sean setting up for tomorrow. It's going to be a night to remember. I'm going to kill my laptop; I'll take so many pictures!

Last weekend we all partied at Jamy's, it was a night to remember, I must post some videos. I went to Sky's room and the whole party followed me. I made everyone wear band aids. This emo girl was not having me, she gave me dirty looks for being in the same room as her. It was pretty funny. Dirty looks used to bother me, now they're just a way of life.

I'm so happy, I have no desire to bring anyone down, I see the same people getting the same negative treatment. Nice guys finish last, so come to my club and we can all be nice guys.

The comments I get are silly and rude lies, the comments you get are honest, scathing observations and jokes.

Talk all you want. I'll be over here having fun away from the negativity.

26 days till New York!

So this is what my world looks like today. I love this weather.

Honestly I am an exhausted girl. I'm very happy to have design this week, I'm working with Demet, she's this amazing Belgian girl so I'm glad we got assigned together. We'll be doing 3 storyboards and then next week I'll be sewing bodices. I hope my machine is alright, I accidentily kicked it over the other day, I spoke to Mike about it, he says it'll be fine.

So for the first time in my life I'm avoiding the thought of my birthday. I've just been so busy and now that I'll be flying to the states in June, I'm just excited for May to go away. Everyone wants to know what I'll be doing but I have no plans on the day when I'd always have a plan.

Sasha has been hounding me about making him a hoodie. I really want to, it'll be great practise but I am so sick of pattern cutting after this week I think I'll just put it off until I'm free and can buy one. I hate giving him an unreliable impression but I told him from the start I am so busy, it really has to be on my time.

I enjoy how productive this year has been but I'm trying my best and I'm scared my best won't be good enough. That kind of worry is the kind that changes you, if your best isn't good enough, everything needs to be re-evaluated. Everyone says I'm just being paranoid. Either way this semester should tell me everything I need to know.

I painted skirts for this week too, I was pretty happy with this one, I can just see how I'm going to be obsessed with spray-painting all of my clothes from now on, hehe.

Here's to the countdown for New York, 38 days until I can breathe in Manhattan air!

I don't want breasts anymore I just want one of these

What can I say? I'm impressionable.

Anyway, I better get back to work. I'm trying to finish everything I have to do so that I can go out tomorrow.

I just got back in town today, went to see Iron Man and loved it. For some reason it opened a day earlier here. I heard it's only out in the states tomorrow. Pretty excellent

Lately I've been:

• watching snakes on a plane again, worst movie ever.
• trying to find a sleeveless hoodie pattern for Sasha
• wishing I had metal fittings/iron man get ups
• obsessed with tacky, ugly things hence
• embracing cheesey wannabe gangsta gear
• controlling jukeboxes
• playing roulette
• avoiding thinking about my birthday (it just snuck up on me; I have no plans!)
• getting excited about my New York trip and planning everything from catching a broadway show to tasting my first starbucks (consumer whore and how)
• eating Wonka Nerds like they're being discontinued
• reading Fight Club
• getting sores on my back from Sean massaging me

So I'm gonna be away until things get a little calmer which should be around Wednesday. I have a lot of work due for this week none of which I've started.

So I'm going to go to Sinns with Kelly tonight to celebrate the long weekend. Then I'm going to a hotel next week with Sean and we're going to play roulette, I love gambling with him, we have a couple drinks and just enjoy each other's company. I had a crazy week, had to assemble 3 storyboards by Friday after having the deadline changed. I even forgot my hair treatment yesterday. I stayed up until 5am on Thursday doing all the work. 

My daffodils are dead, I took care of them as best as I could. I'll break it to Kelly over some Haagen dazs later. I finished Dead Like Me and I've started calling everyone "swee art" ala Mason. I need some kind of Mason fix, wish him and Daisy just got together, they were perfectly tragic together. I Love Daisy Adair hair, I was telling Sean. "But your hair is that colour" I insist it's too yellow but I think I'm just obsessed with colourless hair.

I heard they're making a movie, but a different actress plays Daisy. Pity, that. At least Desmond from Lost is in it.

"If Romeo had just masturbated a couple of times a week he would have saved both those nice families a heap of trouble."

The party on Sat was amazing, it was a confusing, crazy night and I've got some priceless footage. Kelly dressed up as me, she wore my matric dance dress and she looked a lot like me, it freaked out my brother. The night had so many sparklers, some attempted skateboarding, karaoke and me painting Sky's nails at 4 am. It's just one of those moments, I can't quite explain why they're so memorable. Just, barely knowing him and we start bonding after he randomly asks me to paint his nails, these kind of things should happen more often. If you ever see me, pleae approach me and suggest we go to a theme park or something, not even knowing each other at all. People should interact more randomly. The morning after the party they were just all these people playing guitars outside under the grapevine, it was perfect.

I've been so busy cutting patterns and I finally finished my hip bask skirt. There's a girl at college who has the most amazing bags. I love how I can go there wearing the craziest outfit and everyone just gets it. I love experimenting.

I saw Street Kings today, was ok, expected better from it. Dirty cops, predictable, I thought it would feature more Hugh Laurie. Lately I've been watching rollercoaster videos, getting new Mac Heatherette make up, going though books like crazy, watching Dead Like Me and going to Sinns with Kelly for creme brulee.

It turns out I'll be going to New York in June which is very exciting. I love New York, there's just no place like it. I'm going crazy just planning everywhere to go.

I'm planning a cookie dough party, Everybody can just get a spoon and come hang out.

World, stop putting stupid people in important positions. When did being intelligent translate into being inferior? I have never felt so alone and so smart at the same time, oh wait, I have, this happens all the time; when I don't laugh and everyone else does, when I ask for a clearer, more concise explanation and am told not to think but just to do, when I can identify problems and offer solutions but no one wants them, when some Miu Miu bag girl beams at me because she's got higher numbers. And I must be the idiot because I am so different, right? Fuck you. You let me down. 

I worte a journal and it got deleted. So to summarise:

• I saw my hairdresser, I love her texturising scissors
• Kelly gave me daffodils, my favorite flower.
• We baked Sean a cake with a singing candle and sparklers
• It's Sean's surprise party tomorrow, the theme is "dress up with anything beginning with the letter "S". I'm going as the seven deadly sins.
• B den had 11 million condoms in his bag, Sean swiftly hid them around Kelly's apartment. I love our little crazy family.
• I want to live in a tacky, messy home sweet home with grafitti on the walls and a perpetual party.

I never want to grow up. I want to be young and reckless and silly forever. I always thought "reckless" should have a "w".

Sean and I are doing a movie night tonight, we just picked up popcorn, Dr Pepper (hard to find here), Creme Eggs (also), the Fifth Element and Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey. Our friends are coming round after recovering from bowling and a night on the town last night. Kelly and I went crazy, talking to some North Hampton rugby team (gag), sorry I mean, Roog-be. We did the crane machine in the arcade and Kelly was given an imitation barbie by one of the Brits. It had a pink streak in its hair so Kelly called it Sheri. The girls at college are begging me to wear pink because they know how much I avoid it. It's some kind of fashion school intervention.

We started out Friday night making a bet with the bartender that if we guessed his name, we could get free drinks. We got 5 chances but we lost. Sol. Fucking Sol. He didn't look like a Sol. I love the name game. We did it the other night with our waiter who looked just like Paul Giamatti, his name was Atilla. Needless to say, we haven't been so good with the name game. So last night I bowled some serious gutter balls and high fived my way to victory. My mother is actually a champion bowler, even bowled a 300 once. So I'm pretty ashamed of myself. Then we went to a club and danced on stage, I held my skirt close to me the entire time though but I love how Kelly and I will just do anything for fun no matter how clichéd or annoying. Then we went to a UCT party at another club, with idiots clad in diapers and flouro gear. But the stamp guy let us in free which was killer. Then Boten Anna and Vi sitter i Ventrilo och spelar DotA came on so I had to dance. Kelly and I got up on one of the tables. Yeah...gotta say I miss the punk days, I was never a club kid but you gotta go big or go home and since I haven't been near the old haunts or crowd in a while, I just adapted. Who'da thunk? As long as I keep the crazy. I gotta say I loved hearing the glasses smashing below me. There's a little 100 club nostalgia for you, except this time no one looses their eyesight. I'm a writer, I edit things.

Famous South African designers come in and moderate our work this week, I am freaked out! Hopefully I'll do fine. The owner of the college really liked the article I wrote so he's publishing it. I'm almost finished my hipster skirt, I've sewn the pockets, zip and front hip bask. I'm happy tp have a week off to relax.

Pattern Cutting

Skirt front

Hope you have a great weekend!

So the day began at 7am, waking up and putting on our band gear. Then Sean and I cut a whole in my bag, shoved my camera in and I sewed it up so that we could smuggle it in. It worked and by 9:30 we were in, right at the front by the rails. I did not move for the next 4 hours. So we waited and watched 3 local bands and the 30 show was absolutely amazing. Seeing them live was a lifelong dream of mine and meeting them was the icing on the cake.

They did a meet and greet after the show. I had envisioned it in my head for years, getting my wristband signed and thanking them for their music and I got to do it! When I presented the wristband Shannon gave an enthusiastic "Hello"; I think because no one else had one. "Really? 2002?" Then he shook my hand and told me it was good to meet me, I was just shocked that they would even shake my hand, I mean the wristband signing was amazing but it's not like I was going to ask for hugs or want my bra signed like the fangirls. So I was beyond ecstatic then Tomo pressed his hand against mine with such a friendly smile and then, after thanking them and telling them what a great show it was, Jared held out the wristband and waited for me to let him put it on my wrist. I was floored. I paused for a couple of seconds, just thinking "What? You want to put it on me?!" while he stood there. My lovely boyfriend took pics and got his ticket signed and the guys thanked him for his support. Shannon pointed to us and talked to the other guys when we were waiting in line which seemed like he recognised that we were big fans. The J man also pointed at us when we held up an old hoodie circa 2002, when asking if anyone had heard the first album which was pretty cool.

Sean's original pic which has already been stolen lol.

Muse were beyond great and Chris Cornell is an insane vocalist. I left the concert after Muse and gave my Golden Circle bangle to a Korn fan so he could get a better place, he was so happy and I was psyched too. I definately believe in Karma, it feels like this concert just fell into my lap, the odds of this amazing day happening seemed non-existent.

But I gotta be honest, I just feel so happy that I'm getting a bit disillusioned from my country, beautiful as it is, I've always wanted to live in the states or in London and for some reason this experience just fuelled my desire. I think it just made me realise how distant I am from where all the action is. I guess it's because when I was just chilling with my friends in the late afternoon sun when Good Charlotte were playing, just laying on Sean while Joel Madden talked about his baby and Brendan drinking a beer while Kelly and Christine laughed, I just felt so content and so connected. We're all so similar whether we live in LA or Africa, we're all just looking for happiness and at that moment, with my friends, it felt like I'd found it.  

Ok, it's days away but I'm thrilled already. The first term of college is over! I am so excited. I've done so much and to think 2 months ago I'd never even sewn a button on. I did my draping today, it's incredibly girly but I think it turned out pretty good.

Went out on Friday night, had the most amazing creme brulee and then went to a club, the music was good, It was no Gotham but they played genres other than hip hop and dance. Wesley is always so fun to see. This guy standing next to me at the bar pointed that my lipgloss was poking out of my bag so I just shoved it back in, no big deal. He starts talking again, "Well, aren't you even going to thank me?" Shit yeah, you deserve a fucking medal for looking at my bag. Do you want a cookie you idiot? Before I replied Sean swooped in, blocking him from my view, pretty suave.

I'm feeling so uninspired. I hate the storyboards we're doing now, there are so many restrictions on them. I just want to get it over and done with, but of course, I can't manage to sit down and work. I feel stuck.

Crappy beach theme, crappy cohesion.

My eyes feel like air is constantly blowing on them. I have no idea why. It's really frustrating.

• Finish figures
• Finish tech drawings
• Get fabric
• Finish and bind trendbook
• Finish croque book
• Study for business

Then Easter break. Finally.

My nemisis is an octogenarian spinster, she's not as harmless or as frail as she sounds, wish she was though. Cold to the core, what came first, the attitude or the spinster status? One probably spawned the other. It frustrates me that someone with so much life experience never found the time the learn how to be civil or speak English properly. But enough about this sad old woman.

Why do people have giddy dispositions when the situation demands serious ones? Actually I know, it's because they're too content, scared or lazy to meddle. I feel a heightened sense of awareness and cynicism. But it's lonely being an observer. You don't get dealt what I get dealt so I'd rather be alone than hear your happy banter, what you feel does not apply to everybody else. Which means I can in fact dislike norms or find someone's behaviour inappropriate and perhaps my opinion has merit.

We are the heathens, the ones you will come to when it all comes away.

We take care of you, let you lead blissful, empty lives.

And when you die, what can you take?

A blissful, empty lie.